I'm still here. I've just been quiet. I've been trying to find some interesting things to write about but when I start I just feel like it's not enough. Does that make ANY sense? If I could just be transparent for a second... I am having a hard time bonding with the boys. While I do enjoy my time with them I know that they are leaving so I am keeping my distance...I guess. I have had numerous thoughts about what it will be like to hand them back to their mother and I just can't imagine it...only because I've never done it before. What will our family be like when they're gone? Will we quickly return to normal or will we all grieve for what we've lost even though we've been adequately prepared? Will Hope keep contact with us? Will she still let us be a part of the boys life? I look forward to their life getting back to a 'normal' that is healthy and safe for them. Hope loves her boys. She is nothing like I anticipated. She is a mother that made a mistake...a mistake that she is paying for DEARLY! She wants the best for her boys. Her visits have been extended and hour for a total of 2 hours a week and she comes prepared with a smile on her face ready to make every moment count. I am proud of her for the progress she is making and I know she is only working for the moment her boys are handed back to her. My family was able to go for a long weekend without the boys. They were left with a wonderful respite family and they had a great time. It was a fun break for us and well needed. The next few weeks will be a bit chaotic with the girls and boys starting school. New schedules to learn with a new season upon us. I'm looking forward to it. Arizona will be in 'school' 5 days a week and Lil' Man only 2 hours a week. I look forward to seeing the progress they'll make. Arizona with his social skills and Lil' Man with his speech. I always say..."it's never a dull moment here in this house..." I will definitely be living up to that motto in the next few weeks!